Tom
Explicit/Raw / Explicit/Raw / Explicit/Raw
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1st & 2nd semesters: HONOR ROLL!
Male
100 years old
Inland Empire, CALIFORNIA
United States
Last Login: 7/9/2009
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Mood:
tired
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Tom's Comedian Bio
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| Bio | Born in a military family, lived in the Southeast, Northeast, Midwest, Japan and the Southwest. . . . . Looks like I need to move to the Northwest. | | Influences | The unfortunate necessity of working, temptation, traffic (morons, monkeys, maniacs), heroes, heretics, hoes, hags, cats, dogs, snakes, cows, SPIDERS, people who were NEVER meant to be parents, patience my ass, the never-ending parade of ridiculous news to be found online, what alcohol and drugs do to both celebrities AND common folk, genitalia, thongs, camel-toes, buck-knuckles, bimbos, himbos, rePUBlicans, gambling, bad judgement, depth perception, RAGE, the syndicate in Washington DC, Viva Las Vegas, refusing to bite my tongue, 1% peace of mind, Ludwig van, Stanley Kubrick and Sam Kinison. | | Films | In "A Dream Named Lucid", I played a priest giving a condemned man his Last Rites in LATIN. In the LOWEST voice I could muster. Started to remind myself of Max Von Sydow in The Exorcist. |
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Tom's Interests
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| General | Procreation. Self improvement. Unique challenges. Public figures that CRY OUT for skewering. People that put their ENTIRE foot in their mouth despite their best efforts. (Myself included.) Any and every time Truth is stranger than Fiction. | | Music | BANCO DE GAIA, Joss Stone, Dirty Vegas, Ini Kamoze, Black Sabbath, Beatles, AC/DC, Sugar Ray, Rob Zombie, Beethoven, Marilyn Manson, Sly & The Family Stone, Mozart, Ozzy, (Early) Joe Jackson, The Clash, John Lee Hooker, Rolling Stones, Brian Setzer Orchestra, Madness, Bob Marley, David Byrne/Talking Heads, David Bowie, Strange Cargo and BAGPIPES.
| | Movies | THERE WILL BE BLOOD - BATMAN BEGINS - THE DARK KNIGHT - Munich - Office Space - Schindler's List - Fight Club - The Money Pit - 2001 A Space Odyssey (I WISH they'd put "2061" on film...) - Drugstore Cowboy - Koyaanisqatsi - Powaqqatsi - Naqoyqatsi - Gladiator - Princess Bride - Fire Walk With Me - The Matrix Trilogy - Contact - Office Space - Dr. Strangelove - The Shining. . . . and Anchorman.
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DEXTER (the one on SHOWTIME, not CBS...), Heroes. LOST. My Name Is Earl. Most standup on Comedy Central. Twilight Zone. Drew Carey Show repeats. | | Books | ANGELS AND DEMONS - Drew Carey's DIRTY JOKES AND BEER - Lord Of The Rings - DUNE - Esquire's THE RULES - Dean Koontz's ODD THOMAS - The Darwin Awards | | Heroes | Tom Hanks, Jim Carrey, Frank Herbert, Douglas Adams, Mel Brooks, Steven Spielberg and that guy I see in the mirror every morning, in that parallel universe, that looks just like me. |
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Comedians of MySpace, Jake Johannsen Fan Club, LOST
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Tom's Details
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| Status: | Married | | Here for: | Networking, Friends | | Orientation: | Straight | | Hometown: | Wherever I am comfortable & able to make a living. | | Ethnicity: | Other | | Zodiac Sign: | Capricorn | | Smoke / Drink: | No / No | | Children: | Proud parent | | Education: | Some college | | Occupation: | Beast of Burden |
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Tom's Latest Blog Entry
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Edumacation
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Election Day
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JURY DUTY IN THE 21ST CENTURY
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My Foot is most comfortable in my mouth
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Inappropriate behavior during chick films...
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Tom's Blurbs |
About me:
1 - ALL REALITY TV IS CRAP.
2 - DEXTER is the best thing to ever happen to TV.
3 - Not only can we all be sure of Death and Taxes, but also Murphy's Law.
Myspace Layouts at Pimp-My-Profile.com / Stones
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Who I'd like to meet:
PRESIDENT OBAMA, anyone capable of repelling while at the same time inspiring, Peter Jackson, Steven Spielberg, Matt Groening, Mike Judge, Bob Marley (the comic), a scientologist who can convince me they're NOT a nutjob (Come ON - - - "XENU", for cryin' out loud???), Joe Rogan, David Fincher, Eva Longoria, Bobcat Goldthwait, Triumph The Insult Comic Dog, Ralph Nader (So I can ask him how he SLEEPS at night - knowing he HELPED W get elected TWICE by insisting he continue his own effing campaign), Steven Wright, Mini-Me, J. J. Abrams, Stephen Hawking and the demon lucky enough to be torturing Ken Lay in HELL
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| Tom's Friend Space (Top 31) |
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