“There is no worse attack than the one that cannot be identified”
--David Llamas, Security Researcher
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"The only secure computer is one that's unplugged, locked in a safe, and buried 20 feet under the ground in a secret location...and I'm not even too sure about that one."
--Dennis Hughes, FBI.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing..."
--Edmund Burke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."
--Martin Luther King Jr.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"On two occasions I have been asked [by members of Parliament], 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question."
--Charles Babbage
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent.
Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts.
Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'press on' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race."
The forbearing use of power does not only form a touchstone, but the manner in which an individual enjoys certain advantages over others is a test of a true gentleman.
The power which the strong have over the weak, the employer over the employed, the educated over the unlettered, the experienced over the confiding, even the clever over the silly—the forbearing or inoffensive use of all this power or authority, or a total abstinence from it when the case admits it, will show the gentleman in a plain light
The gentleman does not needlessly and unnecessarily remind an offender of a wrong he may have committed against him. He cannot only forgive, he can forget; and he strives for that nobleness of self and mildness of character which impart sufficient strength to let the past be but the past. A true man of honor feels humbled himself when he cannot help humbling others.
“The Definition of a Gentleman”
by Cardinal Newman, from The Idea of a University, a series of lectures given in ....Ireland...., 1852.
Hence it is that it is almost a definition of a gentleman to say that he is one who never inflicts pain. This description is both refined and, as far as it goes, accurate. He is mainly occupied in merely removing the obstacles which hinder the free and unembarrassed action of those about him; and he concurs with their movements rather than takes the initiative himself. His benefits may be considered as parallel to what are called comforts or conveniences in arrangements of a personal nature; like an easy chair or a good fire, which do their part in dispelling cold and fatigue, though nature provides both means of rest and animal heat without them. The true gentleman in like manner carefully avoids whatever may cause a jar or a jolt in the minds of those with whom he is cast --- all clashing of opinion, or collision of feeling, all restraint, or suspicion, or gloom, or resentment; his great concern being to make every one at his ease and at home. He has his eyes on all his company; he is tender towards the bashful, gentle towards the distant, and merciful towards the absurd; he can recollect to whom he is speaking; he guards against unseasonable allusions, or topics which may irritate; he is seldom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. He makes light of favors while he does them, and seems to be receiving when he is conferring. He never speaks of himself except when compelled, never defends himself by a mere retort; he has no ears for slander or gossip, is scrupulous in imputing motives to those who interfere with him, and interprets everything for the best. He is never mean or little in his disputes, never takes unfair advantage, never mistakes personalities or sharp saying for arguments, or insinuates evil which he dare not say out. From a long-sighted prudence, he observes the maxim of the ancient sage, that we should ever conduct ourselves towards our enemy as if he were one day to be our friend. He has too much good sense to be affronted at insults, he is too well employed to remember injuries, and too indolent to bear malice. He is patient, forbearing, and resigned, on philosophical principles; he submits to pain, because it is inevitable, to bereavement, because it is irreparable, and to death, because it is his destiny.
If he engages in controversy of any kind, his disciplined intellect preserves him from the blundering discourtesy of better, perhaps, but less educated minds; who, like blunt weapons, tear and hack instead of cutting clean, who mistake the point in argument, waste their strength on trifles, misconceive their adversary, and leave the question more involved than they find it. He may be right or wrong in his opinion, but he is too clear-headed to be unjust; he is as simple as he is forcible, and as brief as he is decisive. Nowhere shall we find greater candor, consideration, indulgence: he throws himself into the minds of his opponents, he accounts for their mistakes. He knows the weakness of human reason as well as its strength, its province and its limits.
If he be an unbeliever, he will be too profound and large-minded to ridicule religion or to act against it; he is too wise to be a dogmatist or fanatic in his infidelity. He respects piety and devotion; he even supports institutions as venerable, beautiful, or useful, to which he does not assent; he honors the ministers of religion, and it contents him to decline its mysteries without assailing or denouncing them. He is a friend of religious toleration, and that, not only because his philosophy has taught him to look on all forms of faith with an impartial eye, but also from the gentleness and effeminacy of feeling, which is the attendant on civilization.
Adapted from “The Gentleman Series” by John Bridges and Bryan Curtis
A gentleman knows how to begin a conversation.
If a gentleman is subjected to a rude remark or rude behavior, he does not offer rudeness in return.
A gentleman allows others to finish their sentences. Even in his most brilliant moments, he does not interrupt.
A gentleman does not talk with his mouth full - even over the phone.
A gentleman is slow to judge the actions of others, either in their public or private affairs.
A gentleman never corrects another person’s grammar - unless he is teaching an English class.
A gentleman does not take part in major arguments over minor issues.
A gentleman makes a conscious effort to use correct grammar, but he resists all temptation to sound overly grand.
A gentleman does not pretend to speak languages that he has not made his own.
A gentleman never asks a woman if she is pregnant.
A gentleman avoids raising his voice and does not shout others down - even in the most heated discussion.
A gentleman says “Excuse me,” not “I’m sorry” when he inconveniences someone while moving through a crowded room.
A gentleman never begins a statement with “I don’t mean to embarrass you but...”
When it comes to accepting social invitations, a gentleman never waits for something better to come along.
A gentleman does not ask anyone - male or female - to divulge his or her age.
When a gentleman initiates a telephone conversation, he knows it is his responsibility to end that conversation.
A gentleman does not use his cell phone when he is at a table with others.
Once a gentleman discovers that he must decline an invitation that he has already accepted, he promptly alerts his host.
When a gentleman receives a number of invitations on his voice mail, he accepts the first one.
A gentleman does not engage in arguments, of any sort, at the dinner table.
When a gentleman is confronted by foolishness, he does not attempt to refute it with reason. Instead, he keeps silent.
A gentleman never claims to have seen a movie or read a book about which he has only read reviews.
In a civil conversation, and when attempting to meet new friends, a gentleman asks the question “What do you think?” often.
A gentleman sincerely appreciates any gift that comes his way, and pens a thank you note to show his gratitude.
A gentleman knows that a toast need not be epic in length, but usually a few well thought out words will convey his wishes.
A gentleman knows that the freshest toast of the evening is the first one offered.
A gentleman knows that, beer steins excepted, he may not toast with anything resembling a coffee cup.
A gentleman never uses a toast to ridicule or embarrass a friend.
A gentleman does not take it upon himself to deliver a toast at a breakfast meeting.
When a gentleman will have guests in his home, he makes sure the toilets are clean and there is plenty of toilet paper.
When a gentleman throws a party, he goes to the grocery store and the liquor store early in the day, and buys plenty of ice.
A gentleman understands that a hat exists for utilitarian purposes, and that it should never be worn inside.
A gentleman always removes his hat during any formal prayers.
If a gentleman has a cold, especially if he is running a fever, he declines all social invitations.
If a gentleman has left a message for another person, he does not leave badgering follow-up calls.
Even if he lives alone, a gentleman never drinks milk directly from the container.
At a concert or any musical performance, a gentleman does not applaud until the end of a complete musical number.
A gentleman does not pick his nose in public. In fact, he is wise that he does not pick his nose at all.
In a theater, church, or any place where people have gathered, a gentleman always turns his cell phone off.
When a gentleman arrives late for a church service, he waits for a suitable pause in the service before sitting down.
About me: I am what I am; I be who I be; So you can kiss my ass if you dont like what you see
Aint it funny how some feelings you just cant deny, And you cant move on, no matter how hard you try?!? Im sick of the hooks ups, the set ups, the fawk ups, the girls who only want one thing, the girl who doesnt know what she wants, and the lady who knows what she wants but doesnt want to admit it! I JUST WANT THE REALLY REAL THING!!!
I have a tender heart. I have a deep sense of compassion. I can show genuine insight into the needs of others; I’m good at listening and talking; and I express a genuine desire to be helpful. Yes, I know that others need to learn to take care of themselves. Yes, I know they need to accept the consequences of their foolish or bad behavior. And sometimes, even when my instinct is to help them, I will let them fend for themselves and let them suffer the consequences of their choices or circumstances. But MOST of the time I am there to help when they need me. If they are in trouble, I offer compassion and go out of my way to be helpful. If they need someone who will listen, I am trustworthy and sympathetic. And I’m direct with them; when they need advice or counsel, I offer it in a straightforward, direct manner, without beating around the bush. I’m also smart enough to know that I cannot take good care of others if I fail to take good care of myself, so I listen to my own wants and needs. If I've run out of sympathetic energy, I spend time restoring myself. If I've ignored my own pain or frustration, I find a friend who will listen well, or go into my own private healing place and give myself permission to focus on me. But before long, I’m back at it with friends, offering a sympathetic ear and compassion on which they learn to trust, also giving straightforward advice and counsel when they ask for it. I do know how to take care of myself, but my genuine interest is in taking care of others.
I have a firm grip on reality and enjoy living in the present tense. But I have a keen imagination that enables me to lift off from time and space to be remarkably creative. I’m especially open to new ideas or new ways of thinking about old problems. I love to approach a conventional idea or a traditional way of doing things by walking around to the other side and explore it from a novel perspective. What's new is what interests me. Like an artist looking for a new way to see, I focus my imagination on envisioning ideas, events or problems in completely original ways. I am intellectually progressive, which means I like to think and feel my way into unexplored landscapes where I let my sense of intellectual adventure romp freely. Because I am so curious I can also be very teachable. I learn from personal and interpersonal experiences as well as from classrooms and textbooks. I absolutely crave new information, and toss and turn it in my vivid imagination. When I come across an idea from someone else, or a thought in my own head that is particularly provocative or original, I light up. With wit and wisdom, Dr. Seuss would describe me like this: "Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!"
Not everyone is thrilled by my adventurous mind. Many people are content with the ideas that have served them and their culture well, and with visions they've grown accustomed to of what is and is not true. They're not lit up at the prospect of moving out of their comfort zone. Others are afraid of new ways of thinking and creative ways of solving problems because they are somewhat fragile in the sense that they have trouble maintaining serenity in their current worlds and don't want someone, like me, for instance, pushing out the edges of their intellectual and cultural cosmos. So I’m not surprised if my unconventional ideas sometimes get me criticized, or if some people walk away from the explorations of new territories of the mind that I find so exhilarating.
Each one of us encounters some hard times; we get caught off guard, or feel a sudden swell of emotion, whether from fear, joy, anger or sadness. Life is just like this sometimes. I know this because I am an emotional person. Another term might be “passionate”. Some people go to great lengths to keep their emotions under wraps, to keep a stiff upper lip, to not let others know what emotions they are feeling. But that is not me. I embrace all of life's emotions, both the joys and the turmoil that life brings our way. When I’m having fun with a group of friends I don't even try to contain my pleasure; I laugh hard and feel every moment of the conversation, soaking in the joy that comes from the experience. I make very intense friendships; ones where all of the depth of emotions that I feel can be shared. Emotions are such an essential part of my everyday life. I may cry at intense movies or when watching a sad story on the evening news. I get angry, at others or at myself, and I do not stifle it. Emotions drive my personality and my relationships - I simply am what I feel. I experience both the highs and the lows more profoundly than most. And I usually relish the intensity of my emotions. For sure I enjoy the positive times. There are those times, though, when my feelings get the best of me and I wonder how I will manage the moment. But because I am so in tune with all of my emotions, I will experience something very pleasant and will be able to engage with that positive feeling to again enjoy the wonderful intensity that life brings me.
Rules are made to be broken, plans are made to be changed, and schedules are made to be altered. Anyone who's been around me for very long knows that is just part of the way I live. I’m a highly spontaneous person who always likes to try new things. Novel and unpredictable situations don't bother me; instead I find them challenging and exciting. I don't like to be hemmed in by someone's idea of how a job should be done or a goal should be accomplished. Where others assume that the way to get something done is to follow whatever guidelines have been laid out, my idea of how to best get things done often involves making it up as I go along. I am as variable as a hawk in full flight - but like the hawk, I keep my eyes on the prize; even in the midst of turmoil I have a sense of where I need to go. I just have my own way of getting there. To the surprise of some of my friends and associates, I do get things done, though. But maybe not on the timeline someone else had hoped for. In fact, I have a reputation as a legendary procrastinator, not because I’m lazy or disinterested, but because following my instincts and creative sense takes longer. But the upside is that often my instincts turn the ordinary into something quite amazing; and some of the times, when I get everything just right, the ordinary original plans become an extraordinary achievement.
People light me up. In conversations, planning meetings or almost any social situation, I bring my energy and my friendly, outgoing personality into these engagements with other people, and I come away pumped up. I can hardly wait for the next event, as long as other people will be there. And I’m good at it. I know how to communicate. I listen well, the first rule of good communication, and then, when it's my turn, I talk vigorously and with animation; in my uninhibited way I give all that I've got to the encounter. In situations where I feel very safe, when I know and trust the people I’m with, I can be very kindhearted and unrestrained. I let my affection for and pleasure in being with others flow freely. I’m wide open and when I get back this same kind of unrestrained warmth, I am deeply satisfied. Because I am so friendly and full of life, these are among my favorite moments.
The Bottom Line
Face it.
Nobody owes you a living.
What you achieve or fail to achieve in your lifetime is directly related to what you do or fail to do.
You can choose your own direction.
Everyone has problems and obstacles to overcome, but that too, is relative to each individual.
Nothing is carved in stone.
You can change anything in your life, if you want to badly enough.
Excuses are for losers; Those who take responsibility for their actions are the real winners in life.
Winners meet lifes challenges head on, knowing that there are no guarantees, and give it all they've got... And never think it's too late or too early to begin.
Time plays no favorites, and will pass whether you act or not.
Take control of your life.
Dare to dream and take risks.
Compete.
If you arent willing to work for your goals, Don't expect others to!
Stability results were high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic..
Orderliness results were low which suggests you are overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense too often of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment.
Extraversion results were medium which suggests you are moderately talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting.
Trait Snapshot: Words that describe me...
USUALLY TAKE CARE OF OTHERS, VERY CURIOUS, VERY RESPONSIVE, VERY FLEXIBLE, OUTGOING, Understanding, Unquestioning, Humane, Selfless, Gentle, Kindhearted, Gullible, Indulgent, Imaginative, Creative, Intellectual, Adventurous, Unconventional, Artistic, Progressive, Daring, Inspired, Emotional, Insightful, Perceptive, Sensitive, Self-conscious, Impulsive, Instinctive, Intuitive, Sometimes Inefficient, Procrastinator, Rule-breaker, Friendly, Gregarious, Full of Life, Unreserved, Kindhearted, Talkative, Emotional, Spontaneous, Vigorous, Messy, Tough, Disorganized, Fearless, Not rule conscious, Likes the unknown, Rarely worries, Rash, Attracted to the counter culture, Rarely irritated, Positive, Resilient, Abstract, Not a perfectionist, Risk taker, Strange, Weird, Self reliant, Leisurely, Dangerous, Anti-authority, Trusting, Optimistic, Positive, Thrill seeker, Likes bizarre things, Sarcastic
Success To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.
(Unknown, not Ralph Waldo Emerson)
Success “He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much; who has enjoyed the trust of pure women, the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children; who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; who has left the world better than he found it whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul; who has never lacked appreciation of Earth's beauty or failed to express it; who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had; whose life was an inspiration; whose memory a benediction.”
by Bessie ....Stanley....
That Man is a Success Who has lived well, laughed often and loved much; Who has gained the respect of intelligent men and the love of children; Who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; Who leaves the world better than he found it, whether by improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul; Who never lacked appreciation of earth's beauty or failed to express it. Who looked for the best in others and gave the best he had.
by Robert Louis Stevenson
To live content with small means; To seek elegance rather than luxury, To be worthy, not respectable, and wealthy, not rich; To study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly; To listen to stars and birds, to babes and sages, with an open heart; To bear all cheerfully, do all bravely, await occasions, hurry never. In a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the commonplace. This to be my symphony!
William Henry Channing (1810-1884)
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not in just some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson , in Return to Love (often mis-attributed to Nelson Mandela who, contrary to internet legend, did not use the quote in his inaugural address.)
THE DEFINITION OF SUCCESS
by Joan Marques
Last night I had a telephone conversation with a friend, and while we were mulling over one subject after another, I mentioned how cool it would be if only I could win the lottery. I remember stating that I wouldn't even mind sharing the jackpot with a few other people, as long as a couple of millions were left hanging for me.
My friend asked me what I would change about my life if I was wealthy, and that's when it hit me: Nothing really. The only difference would be that I would not have to be concerned about paying the monthly bills anymore, and maybe that I would purchase a nice house in the hills, but the actual contents of my life and the way I have furnished it so far would not undergo any significant transformation.
This discovery intrigued me. In fact it got me mulling over it long after the conversation with my friend was over! I started wondering if the universal measure of success should not be: the degree to which a person manages to be satisfied with the general contents of his or her routine.
Just think about it for a moment: there are many wealthy people who would give away half or all of their assets if only they could obtain contentment. And there are many people balancing on the edge of poverty, but with peace in their heart, faces that smile a lot, and a set of activities that they would not want to change for the world. Now, which category of these people is really successful?
My conclusion is, that success has just as many faces as any other possible theme, depending on the society in which it is measured, and the character of the person who measures it. Wrongfully, many people confuse success with wealth: they assume that a person's triumph can be concluded from the expensiveness of his or her watch, car, or house. They envy those in their circle of acquaintances who can financially afford more than they can. They keep comparing themselves with the Joneses and allow their happiness to depend on the level to which they can equal these people's lifestyles. And they forget to just do the simplest thing in the world: turn inside and analyze what it is that they really like.
I think success should be more synonymous with happiness than with affluence. For it's only when you find satisfaction with what you're doing and don't dread facing every new day when your task has to be embarked upon, that you are really successful. When you can move in an environment that pleases you, and when you feel at ease with the ones you deal with on a daily base; when you feel loved, cared for, understood, and valued in what you do, and you don't have to switch personalities from one location to another: that's when you've really attained success. When you see that you make a difference, if only in one person's life; when you are confronted with gratitude, not only from others toward you, but from your outer-self to your inner-self: that's when you are a real winner.
Success, therefore, cannot be measured by what radiates from a person's purse or material cover, but from what exudes from his or her personality. You can feel it in one's touch, you can hear it in one's voice: in the way one speaks, and you can see it in one's eyes. Successful people are self-assured, know what they want, and go for it. And what they want, they simply determine with feeling, and not with what others dictate them.
So, are you successful?
WHAT IS A SUCCESSFUL LIFE?
What is a successful life? A few moments' thought will convince us that the question is by no means an easy one to answer. We say this, that, or the other man is successful, but what do we mean by it? One man has houses and lands, has a large bank account, drives fast horses and has many apparent friends, such a man is accounted successful. Yet all of these things that minister to his pleasure have been acquired by unremitting labor, by hard, avaricious dealings with his fellow-men, by trampling upon the hearts and affections of thousands; in the face of these facts is the man a successful one?
The question will be answered differently, according; to the views of life of the one answering it. Some think wealth is the only measure of success no matter how attained. Such people have tuned their psalm of life very low. Such people will read the grand tragedies of Shakespeare and remember only this line, “Put money in thy purse.” The horizon of their lives is bounded with dollars and the chink of silver is more melodious to them than the symphonies of Mozart.
The man who becomes wealthy is in a measure successful, but only so far as the acquirement sharpens his intellect, broadens his powers, and develops him into a self-reliant, powerful member of society for its good. Selfish wealth is never good. One may be a millionaire, but if with it comes greed, avarice, oppression of others, the success is small indeed. Scattered along the path of life we find examples of men whose success brought them fame and glory and proved an unqualified blessing to all mankind. . . .
[Scientist Louis] Aggasiz was at one time importuned to go upon the lecture platform and make money out of his vast knowledge as a naturalist. His reply will be ever memorable: “I have no time to make money.” Such a man would be hooted at on Wall Street by the men who speculate in the earnings of others and imagine themselves the great business men of this age. Yet whose success is greatest, that of Louis Agassiz standing among his pupils . . . teaching them the secrets of nature, or that of Jay Gould heaping together millions wrung from the failure of thousands of his fellows? One rests secure in a pure fame, the other is hated and feared by his neighbors and at the last will have been simply notorious.
There is one criterion by which success can be fairly measured, that is the estimate placed upon us by our fellows. If a man is hated, is feared and shunned, if he is looked upon as small, avaricious, greedy, he is not a successful man though he be worth millions. On the other hand, if a man’s praises are upon the lips of all, if his reputation is that of an honest, sincere, and sympathetic gentleman, his success is assured, although he has not a dollar of his own.
Source:
Firemen’s Magazine, October 1884.
As parents, we want our children and teens to grow up and "be successful." But what "being successful" means depends on our definition of "success" in the first place. Obviously "success" means a lot of different things to a lot of different people. Our definition of success has become "The Progressive Realization of Moral, Virtuous, or Godly Goals."
As a parent, how are you defining "success" for your children? How do you define "success" for yourself as a parent?
Each of these questions is important for us to think through. Many of us, kids included, only define success in terms of what we have, or what we have accomplished so far in life. Some define success in terms of how society and culture define it, while others have chosen to define "success" through the eyes of God, as best as they can know it.
As for me, I define "success" as "the progressive realization of moral, virtuous, or Godly goals." As I look at my kids and rate their levels of success, or rate myself as their parent, I want to keep in mind what my kids are becoming, rather than what they have accomplished in the past. As long as I can see my kids on a path toward becoming productive and honorable adults, then I will feel successful as a parent.
Parents, please relax a bit.
I want to encourage each of you to take a long term view in regards to your role as parents. I have received many emails from parents of 4, 5, and 6 year old kids who are having trouble with attention span, or coloring within the lines, or reading, or whatever. Please relax.
Focus on getting your child onto a road that will lead them to be productive as adults. Teach your children how to be good fathers and mothers to their own children in the future. Teach your kids how to love and serve other people. These are the major lessons. See life in the context of eternity, and your definition of success will change radically, both for your children and yourself.
