About TYRANIZE (free shirt with mortician show ticket)
Formed in the late Autumnal season, of the year two thousand and six. Five monoliths rose up from the Bog. These seemingly innocent spires were actually "capsules" containing the exiled creations of more noteable Elders. They posed no threat. That is, until a young boy walked by and, giving into his curious nature decided to pry open one of these "capsules." To his dismay he had awoken the giant Hamid bin Sayid bin Mohammed bin Abdullah bin Bensala, or something like that. Nevertheless the boy was promptly consumed by the giant whose hunger became known as 'The Nothing' Living up to this name Hamid began to consume the surrounding structures only to reveal a hairy wolf-like creature, a Moonspook if you will. DanK was his name he awoke and said "Hey, I need to get my finger stinky!"...which he did after running off to a nearby rail station. The next pillar consumed contained a whitty subject with balls of steel. This was Yimmy, who was pissed off because it was cold, slapped Hamid and began to run around the giant in circles. He was never caught. The third one consumed contained the blasphemer Murph of Quake who mistook the giant as foe, however realized they both shared a similar hunger...friendship ensued. Finally the last one consumed contained the essence of EdZ...I say essence because EdZ had aleady left his tomb of brutality to practice on his drumset... With his training at an end, EdZ pulled together this Death Squad and they marched TYRANIZE on to Victory and Success! They smothered Upstate New York with their filth and their lies! They had their targets set on world domination, whence, they appeared unstoppable, the ASPCA stepped in. Animal control seized the giant Hamid for consuming a child. Upon conviction of child consumption, he was put down. Those who wish to offer their condolences may do so at his resting place, Albany's Corning Tower at the Empire State Plaza. Nevertheless, Tyranize has found an abominable bassman and shall continue their Reign as Masters of the Universe! Until next time...
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