Julius Toney

About me:

One night I was on the phone with you because you understood my heart was gone. Filled with insanity and not knowing the right mix for my heart and family. I let myself get eaten alive even with a shield. But as we talked, a tear came down my eye feeling your concern of me dying after sixteen years. My scenery of living kept me in the state of not breathing. Staying suppressed and depressed can never bring some belief in reason. So I tried to keep to myself at best at arms’ reach. But not so much that you would feel my heart as soon as I speak. I just wanted to let you know that I loved you and not bring the negativity toward you. Of course, I realize that was impossible and felt you grab and want to hold me. Trying to be strong and responsible for who I am, so I didn’t want any comfort. For me, that not only hindered and crippled me, but was almost the death of me. But I just want to say that you played an important part in me coming back to life. God gave me you so I don’t forget in knowing I have come so far.

Next To

She sits and speaks as an angel who has been through a lot of poverty. Embedded in a place where she steals to get a meal. I can only imagine the things to make it happen to live. She has entrusted her life to pure will and it’s all right that it isn’t all right. In plain sight, only seen as a prosperous candlelight. So our meet and greet is making the effect of the perspective ford for something that we both can enjoy. To grow and see what’s in store for each other for good or worse. The cloud that rains overhead brings about a common feeling of a shield. The shield is cold, moist, and hard to break through, causing a miscommunication, so I can’t hear what she is saying. Now all I hear is all the voices putting their two cents in it on how this was going to happen from the beginning. Choosing what I would prefer is not good but, hopefully I will deter to pick the best. A Kodak moment is in midst of a process again being put to the test. I am blessed to be able to handle my business, since this is a blemish. I am never able to finish what I started, but that’s because I stick to my priorities. One being you in things I do to you. The company you keep is something I can’t hold if you are dead weight for me. So I know if my secrets are with you, then my heart will follow suit. Then again, those go hand in hand, two in two, like a match is likely to do. In a position where I can’t even say I’m lucky if anybody can stay to come together in harmony with me. For clarity, I’ll let her set stage to center what it is she wants to express. Rather she’s authentic or not, I know I would have done what I could to establish you in my wood. Keep the fires blistering, hot to add what God started to keep it going nonstop. For my goal is very simple. For my temple, you are an asset and it can only get better from that. So my main purpose is to hold and do the best, and I will always have a silent peace somewhere.

In You

Our eyes met from the sensation of curiosity in a day where there is a lot of mediocrity. A possibility or chance you can be more than a doormat or coffee stand. Your sweet tender intellectual voice shouts a comfort ability of some sorts. Down from the depths on the inside is God’s daughter and a woman with sustained order. With steps, I have no idea about but I know are all in God’s glory. Your smile has a style I can admire as you tilt your head sideways and you wonder can I see you now. For your sensitivity and gracious heart, which never stops, are values I can validate in my mind from the start. Penetrating through the warfare while in the midst of your heart is a feeling and common place where I find myself. When you speak, I can hear your heart breathe and feel the glow of a new season. I will not entertain fantasy in speaking colorful like love. Rather to invite you to this place of some rest and relaxation. To give you some vaccination to help cure the view of this lackluster solitude from the things people do to you. I will not under any circumstance chance my body and heart for something that sounds good and puts me in a good mood. I know you do not trust me because I am just another dude who will in time face the music. This wonderful lady, I must give up because of the spaces of her catastrophic cases in her heart so she can not take it. With a smile on my face, there is nothing like genuine love to know some situations you cannot take them. Otherwise, other people’s problems will break me. Because I am human and I cannot force the issue for them to make it. Ms. Brooks, do not take this the wrong way because it took a lot to get to where I do not get shook with utter violence and makes some people suicidal. Basically, when you see the same occurrences and no differences, it makes you wonder what makes me a capable entity. To be honest with you, nothing makes me different except you knowing if I provide some fire to help keep you going. To keep the ship rowing and not cut off your life support.

Got To Get the Feeling

The farther you walk away, there is one security in place. I know, regardless of where you are, my flexibility becomes evident as my feelings try to grow with an uproar. This is where I find peace, because I know with situations I can see right through you. As with me, I am prone to bring out some emotion, even unintentionally. I spent most of my young life trying to find a cure for the unsure sight of the willing that approach me. I am constantly passing by worlds that seem stuck in a twirl, but swear ain’t nothing wrong, everything’s fine. So I’m thinking as I look from side to side and at every angle, I see a possible expiration date that might be invalid before we have a chance to marinate. That is not to say you’re questionable and unsavory, but reality can’t be maybe if I’m supposed to be with you faithfully. Last time I checked, I can’t stand properly without any legs no matter how amazing it could be to stand on my hands instead. Because one without the other is like holding waste in with no escape and you cramp up without unleashing what you had the other day. So you treat your mind the same way, otherwise it will become non-existent, continually getting pierced through the flesh. Even with all the blood, you still don’t know what’s killing you and the dilemma just devours you. But seeing something is one thing and doing something about it is another. I won’t live in any house without God’s light that leads me from obscurity. I’ve never been always right, but my sincerity stirs with clarity, knowing of lost love. I don’t know how to love if I don’t know how to let go. Especially if I’m tired and I’m ready to go, because I have no purpose in what has been persuaded to me to be so real to just let it flow. I understand I ain’t the best thing since sliced bread, but I’ve been dead before. Realizing my life has been misunderstood since I was four years-old. Like every story that has been told, I chose to do my best even if it’s my last breath and my time to go.

I am showcasing my book "Unspoken Words" for anyone wants it. It is NOW AVAILABLE ON AMAZON and BARNES and NOBLES. My book is a more in depth look at my way thinking as a person. As far as for me I am serious and composed person for the most part. But I can have real conversation and learn new things with you. Although I can be serious I can be quite silly to balance myself out. Also, I cherish who I am and the things I do because there is only one shot at life. For my future wife and kids (if God bless me with them) I know I have to have a foundation for them to live. In pertaining to my calling as a man and standing up as a man goes hand in hand. Here is a taste of what is in my book. Check out my blogs to check out my poetry. Later!