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Velvet Tom
Velvet Tom Lover. Loser. Legend.

Male
102 years old
Los Angeles
United States



Last Login: 10/16/2009
Mood: crunk Mood Image
View My: Pics | Videos | Playlists | Gifts

   Contacting Velvet Tom

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   Velvet Tom's Comedian Bio
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    Velvet Tom's Interests
GeneralVelvet Tom is into Singin', Sinnin', Lovin', Winnin' and Losin'. His interests also include seducing you with my renditions of Bon Jovi's "It's My Life" and Backstreets "I Want it That Way", and MANY MORE!!! Velvet Tom Part Two

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Music"I love music! After all it's my bag, Cats and Kittens!" - Velvet Tom. Music makes VT much more tolerable and less repelent to his public! Some of Velvet Tom's fans were and still are some of the biggest names in the industry: John Cash (I can call him John, I knew him), Bobby Zimmerman (You know him as Bob Dylan, but when you're invited to his Bar Mitzvah, and he get's you high at that same Bar Mitzvah, you reserve the right to call him by his God given name), U2 (Even though that Bono fella stole my whole, 'world peace and the decrease of world debt' rap after my fall from grace with the public back in the '90s. It was totally my idea, but how can I prove it? PLUS MANY, MANY MORE!!
MoviesThe following is an excerpt from, Playpen Magazine July 1995: "I'm a huge fan of movies! I coulda' been a huge movie star and a Trans-Continental Phenomenon if I'd only taken the role of the gay bank robber in 'A Dog Day Afternoon'. Although I cannot commit to certain titles of movies, I'm a big fan of the comedy genre...laughter is a cure-all for everything accept for Cancer and AIDS, but a broken heart?...that's another story. Unless your broken heart was caused by Cancer or AIDS then nothings funny, and you're, well, kinda screwed. I dig a good romance once in a while. Even VT has a soft and sensative side that isn't guided by the overwhelming aching in his pants. Horror films can go screw themselves, because never once in a horror movie does the bad guy end up killing the entire cast and rendering him victorious...where's the reality people!?"
TelevisionVelvet Tom on his TV watching habits: "I don't really have much use for television if they're not going to let me on it. I've lost interest with reality television, even though I am in my own talks with VH1 to become an extra added feature of their Celebreality Programing, where 24 gorgeous women from across the US are picked to live in a house with me, and each week 2 of them get to reject me for their own personal reasons."
BooksI love Celebrity Biographies. And I'm publishing mine...just as soon as I have something to write about. Velvet Tom part One

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HeroesWhen asked at the Annual Playboy Mansion Halloween Party in 2003, Velvet Tom had this to say: My hero is, well, me. Duh. I should be your hero too. Some other folks I look up to are people that get up every day and create art. Art that serves the public. Not the artists that are tormented and provocative for arts sake. I don't tolerate the angry person who selfishly exploits his/her craft because Daddy didn't hug them or Mommy hugged them too much, or they came from the streets, or the school of hard knocks where their school colors are black and blue and they have somethin' to say. I pity them and I hope they get help, but they gum up the works, and give a bad name to those hardworking folks who just want to give back. Instead the bad seeds fuel a conservative agenda to keep Johnny from buying the Kanye West album in the event he might hear the word "fuck" in context. (LONG PAUSE. COUPLE OF SIPS ON HIS DRINK) Oh, and I like Superman too.
Groups: Official Myspace Group for www.CastingYou.com

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     Velvet Tom's Details
Status:Swinger
Orientation:Straight
Hometown:Kansas City, MO
Religion:Taoist
Zodiac Sign:Cancer
Smoke / Drink:Yes / Yes
Children:Love kids, but not for me
Education:College graduate
Occupation:Sexy Motherfucker

   Velvet Tom's Networking
Theatre - Drama - Acting
Velvet Tom's Red Shoe Diary, the funniest show, no one has ever seen.
Music - Performance - Vocals
Professional Comedy Lounge act!

   Velvet Tom's Companies
ComedySportz Nationwide
US
performer

11/92 - the apocolypse
Second City - Las Vegas
Las Vegas, NV US
performer

10/04 - 5/06
Maggiano's Little Italy
Chicago, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, US
Slave.....waiter, (sigh) Slave.

04/02 - 06/07


Velvet Tom's Latest Blog Entry  [Subscribe to this Blog]

Last Stop For Paul  (view more)

Crap Alert  (view more)

I am Youtubed....Finally  (view more)

The Man Who Saw Tomorrow  (view more)

Velvet Tom’s New Fall TV Pick ’em  (view more)

[View All Blog Entries]

   Velvet Tom's Blurbs
About me:
What can we say? Velvet Tom is a hard drinkin', hard lovin', B-List Lounge Singer with an A-list libido. He has such a voice that it'll make your panties melt off...right through your jeans. With the help of Velvet Tom's back up singers, The Velveetahs and his band the Velours, we'll guarantee any ordinary night out into a night of love, and smarm. One you will most certainly not forget. Velvet Tom has been wowing audiences for years with his rousing versions of songs, previously ruined by the ones who originally performed them. VT is about to embark on his 10th comeback in 11 years. We invite you to acquaint yourself with the mystery and magesty, that is Velvet Tom. It's time for you to believe that he is a Lover. Loser. And Legend. MySpace Layouts love layout @ Unique MySpace Layouts - Movie Layouts - Music Layouts - More MySpace Layouts! - MySpace Tools
MySpace Layouts
MySpace Layouts
Unique Myspace Layouts

Come visit my store on CafePress!
Who I'd like to meet:
Velvet Tom is a full service musical comedy act, that will travel all over the world (even Canada) to perform for you. His back up singing sensation, The Velveetahs are an elite group of women made up of his wives, ex-wives and future ex-wives. The Velours are made up of any musician the will work for booze, drugs and nudie magazines. We want your fanship. We need your fanship and we will go at any length to get it. Yes, even that! We want to perform for you. The Velvet Tom show can tailor it's material to fit your entertainment needs! We will perform for your: Product Launch, Cocktail Party, Holiday Function, Bar Mitzvah, Briss, and Even Funeral. No show is too large or small for Velvet Tom and his questionable band of associates! Come find us! Contact us here! We'll make your dreams come true, and our nightmares reality.


   Velvet Tom's Friend Space (Top 23)
Velvet Tom has 596 friends.
 Paul 


 MS. Plus America 2009 


 Joshua Zehner 


 Don 


 Lori McClain 


 Jeremy 


 Brendan Hunt 


 Superego 


 Monique 


 U2 


 Seamus McCarthy, Mr. Nice, His Majesty Dynamite 


 Corey 


 Tom 


 Jesse 


 Jennifer 


 Corbin 


 aubrey 


 Matt 


 Theresa 


 Jack 


 Mark 


 Julia 


 Angela Ryan.com 





Velvet Tom's Friends Comments
Displaying 25 of 156 comments  ( View All | Add Comment )
MS. Plus America 2009

Steph DeWaegeneer



Jan 1 2009 7:02 PM

Wishing you get everything you can put your hands on in 2009!


Sparkle

Sparkle



Dec 22 2008 3:26 PM

Please enjoy the last "Sparkle Picnic" of '08? More coming January 12th!


Sparkle Picnic: Gay Ass Title



www. SparklePicnic. com
Abigail

Abigail



Dec 23 2008 6:23 AM

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Sparkle

Sparkle



Dec 16 2008 10:54 AM

I made this for you. Like a cake.


www. SparklePicnic. com
Richard Ryan

Richard Ryan



Nov 3 2008 3:08 AM

I need some subscribers! If you don't have a youtube account sign up and subscribe to me!
Richard Ryan

Richard Ryan



Oct 31 2008 6:54 AM

Abigail

Abigail



Oct 31 2008 5:53 AM

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The Westside Eclectic

The Westside Eclectic



Sep 11 2008 12:50 AM

Hey Vel!

ICN Season 2 Screening
Thursday September 11th 10 PM after our House Improv Teams
FREE bring yer friends and stay for the Jam afterwards.

I wanted to get in touch to let you know about a very special event that we'll be holding this Thursday at 10:00 PM after our House Improv Teams. As you may know the WE is the live stage for the Independent Comedy Network (ICN. tv) which licenses and produces online content. We have a slew of really great projects and prospects under way (including an online pilot deal with Marshal Hershcavits) and we'll be screening our new shows this coming Thursday at 10. We're really excited to show off all of this hard work, and one of the projects (shameless plug) "We Grow Together" was created by Lloyd Ahlquist and a bunch of his buddies.
J-Dog

J-Dog



Jul 10 2008 4:30 AM

R u gonna go to any bars in Hollywood or just that one on Fairfax? I want to go but I don't want to drive. Get back to me on this very important issue.
Am I still invited?
The Westside Eclectic

The Westside Eclectic



Jul 8 2008 11:13 PM

Hey Velvet!

The Vets Show
Improv veterans come from the Westside Eclectic teaching staff and around the city come to show off their stuff in this 40 minute fully improvised comedy set.

Would love to see you there!

This week's cast:

Dana Powell
Jeff Sloniker
Sean Monahan
Maribeth Monroe
Ryan Smith
Brian Bradley
Megan Whyte
and more...
Hosted by Lloyd Ahlquist

Westside Eclectic Theater
Thursday July 10th at 9:30 PM
$8
FREE for students
MS. Plus America 2009

Steph DeWaegeneer



Jun 23 2008 5:06 AM

Hey! Isn't this where we shared that bottle of Strawberry Hill and my Special Purpose?!?!

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J-Dog

J-Dog



Jun 8 2008 8:55 AM

Miss you!
Laughing Merovin

Laughing Merovin



May 23 2008 9:11 PM

hey Tom, great show last night! We should hang out--I can be your wingman!
Julia

Julia



Apr 7 2008 8:01 PM

two words. rock. band.
xo
Smith and Pyle

Smith and Pyle



Mar 24 2008 7:24 PM

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Harvey Sid Fisher

Harvey Sid Fisher



Feb 27 2008 6:33 AM

Moonville fit palm -4- Velvet Tom


Harvey Sid Fisher .com
(((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))
http://www. astrologysongs. com
http://www. youtube. com/user/astrologysongs


Linda

Linda



Feb 11 2008 9:59 AM

I'm curious as to just what it is you requested from Klodi ??
Laughing Merovin

Laughing Merovin



Jan 30 2008 7:27 PM

Hey Tom, thanks for coming to my show!! It was great hanging out with you! See you soon!
Matt

matt gourley



Jan 23 2008 11:50 PM

http://www.rowthree.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/01/rambo-death-chart.jpg
Klodi

Indian Vixen



Jan 14 2008 10:47 PM

Bruce In San Diego

Bruce Montgomery



Dec 31 2007 3:51 PM


Girly Comments & Graphics

♫Heather♫

♫Heather♫



Nov 26 2007 8:03 PM

Were you in a commercial for Little Tykes? I must have seen it a hundred times. If not, you have a twin out there!
Miami Undergound Film Festival

Miami Underground Film Festival



Nov 6 2007 4:47 AM

Hey Filmmakers and Cineastas:

The Miami Underground Film Festival is opened for business. Sorry about the delays, but I was shooting a Radio Shack commercial in NYC.

We are open for submissions for the 2008 Miami Underground Film Festival.

Early Deadline is November 13, 2007.

Remember we have several awards and several categories, Home Cookin (any film from Florida), Student and Open.

Our motto is, the rules are there are no rules.

Last year we trippled in size, this year, we are looking for more Home Cookin. Come on UM students were are you. Come on MIU students let's see your stuff. Hey Art Institute, I'm talking to you, let's get the student mojo going.

What's up New York, you got some underground shit, let's see it. Hey West Coast, I'm talkin to you cats too.

If you or anyone you know would like to submit a short, feature, documentary, music video or snipet, please send a DVD and Media kit to:

Miami Undergroud Film Festival
1825 Ponce de Leon Blvd. #437
Coral Gables, Florida 33134

Entry fee is : $25 Regular stiffs, $20 students. Remember the fee goes up for regular stiffs so enter early.

Thanks again,

Rafael Diaz Wagner
director
M.U.F.F.
info@miamiundergroundff.com

PS:I didn't spell check so if you find any errors, keep them to yourself biatch, this is the Underground Film festival not the tea drinking look at my shinny new BMW festival.
Megan

Megan Nykodym



Nov 6 2007 3:50 AM

Hey there fella, how the hell are ya doin'?
Julia

Julia



Nov 1 2007 6:55 AM

Happy Boo Day! Haven't seen you in awhile. Boo!
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