Wednesday Magazine

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next show
march 3rd
8 pm
viper room!!!

UNLESS I’m ACTING


This is not how I planned it/my life

I'm wearing too much makeup
My skirt is hiked too high
I'm selling things I shouldn't
To people who [don't] wanna buy
But they buy
Me, success, sex. A good time
Not what I'm selling
Not what I had in mind

My desperation is creepy
I shake my ass they laugh
Give me a few dollars I'm lonely
And tired and don't know why I'm doing this

I step from my car
With pushed up tits
And stomach sucked in
Into the cold air
I'm off to serve middle eastern/ers/men
the American dream
In a black corset
And a bottle of jim beam
With red lips and empty eyes
Unsaitisfired lies
enough to make any man scream

More.


The men are smiling
I put my hand on their shoulders
How easy it is to fall into something
I don't believe in not one bit
And I'm good
And there breaths stink of whiskey and wives who misunderstood
And he touches my tit
And I pretend not to notice
I try to turn away
But don't [no not fully]

When I was small I wondered how girls looked so dead in their eyes?
How do you become ddead
Without emotion
Easy I think now
AS THEy CRAWL UP MY LEG
Leeching for love in a sub zero way
You just don't think about it


The Midwestern midget with the wandering hands
Has had his way with me again
Because my voice wsas caught somewhere in the wind
With my soul and my [dirty] laundry and the life within
Hanging from my dead mothers porch
In some nameless town I will not go back to
I came here to make it big
I came here and forgot why

see my stained painties smiling
I'll say no next time

I taste the night
It is filthy and full of promise
I'm in love with three guys
None of them fully
I just want love
But I hate my body
So I won't let anybody touch
Unless I'm acting

in the boat where it is always morning, andy

alas! the nature of the world overwhelms me
his hands lacing webs across my heart
ingraining sands, his scent, in my blood
this abyss of the mind he reads like water
pulling from me oil, gold, soda pop cans
the forbidden,
my fathers darkness,
he fishes with his tongue and hands
he fishes truth and desire
i'm not sure how i started this
fell into him
the oceans of our lives/eachother
fall together in 1 tidal bliss
holding me back/ holding me down
spinning in the lights on the edge of the water
where the fisherman's boat makes a little yellow circle wave in the water..
and the children below [andinthewind]
fall and laugh away/ laugh and fall away
i'm laughing
in the coldness that blows in my face
and his hands smothering me into the sheets
on my mothers bed
where years ago i would cry and search for the end
the notes he plays on my skin
his brown skin my white skin the sound of hours finally forgiven
the notes he plays on my skin
behind him, the mirror
we are dancing in
covered in gems and sweat
his eyes sparkle
oh let this moment never end
the dream of each-other
i can see his teeth and the whites of his eyes [as they] tear and swallow
. "tell me a story i say" whisper into his hair
that knots and releases between my fingers
that once clawed and begged
now are whisping willows, falling leaves, move like a warblers wing
that sings for me outside our window
his skin feels eternity
he brings my hand to his mouth
and blesses it
. "onnce upon a time"
this is a dream, this is a dream,
this is a
what i always wanted
'don't be afraid' he says whenever i close my eyes and vanish into the vastness of memory
of dead mans tales that ripped from me, made me bleed out innocence before i could read
'warning'
'escape'
. "there was a young beautiful girl"
i love stories like this, my eyes close, i fall into the