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denise☆police
;her middle name was boom.

fight off your demons;

My name is Denise. I'm 5'4" -- call me short if you want to, but I've seen shorter -- and I'm twenty years old. My nickname is Dee (or Nise, as Sakena calls me). I'm generally a very quiet person when it comes to my opinion; moreso when I'm around the people I care about or like a lot because I fear they might think differently of me if I do. But if I really feel that you need to hear something, then I'll say it. I'm trustworthy and as honest as any human being can be. I do my best in everything and I try to make everyone happy -- which ultimately leaves me either unhappy or struggling to please everyone. I still haven't learned.

My favourite show as of right now is How I Met Your Mother and one day I hope to meet Neil Patrick Harris because he is LEGEN -- wait for it, and I hope you're not lactose intolerant cause this last part is -- DARY!


Random Facts About Denise
+ When Denise goes to donate blood, she declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
+ Denise was once a knight in King Arthur's court. She was known as Sir Beatdown.
+ Denise drinks napalm to quell her heartburn.
+ Denise can taste lies.
+ Denise doesn't play "hide-and-seek." She plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
+ The 11th commandment is "Thou shalt not piss off Denise". This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.
+ Denise does not know where you live, but she knows where you will die.
+ Denise can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
+ When Denise enters a room, she doesn't turn the lights on, she turns the dark off.
+ Denise plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.
+ In an emergency, Denise can be used as a floatation device.
+ They once made a Denise toilet paper, but there was a problem -- it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
+ Denise once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
+ Denise enjoys a good practical joke. Her favorite is where she removes your lower intestine and pretends to make a balloon animal out of it. Then she cracks your skull open with a Volvo for not complimenting her on her balloon animal.
+ Staring at Denise for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause blindess, and possibly foot sized brusies on the face.
+ Time waits for no woman. Unless that woman is Denise.
+ Denise had to stop washing her clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.
+ The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Denise played in second grade.
+ Denise does not "style" her hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
+ Denise crossed the road. No one has ever dared question her motives.
+ Denise visits an active volcano every morning to get some of "the best damn espresso on Earth".
+ The word 'Kill' was invented by Denise. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.
+ Denise can hit you so hard that she can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"
+ Denise once bet NASA she could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Denise re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes her a beer.
+ Denise doesn't stub her toes. She accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.