Jack the Baptist

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-I like hats, scarves, sunglasses, and hookah bars.
-I sustain life with soup, wine, and apple juice.
-I'm cruel and crude and insensitive to emotions.
-I once poked a fetus, and financially contributed to the death of another.
-I like to ride down the highway in the rain, at night, with the windows down..
-Humanity comes in many colors, and I even like the purple ones.
-My eyes are the color of rainclouds, and I hate boys who wear make-up.
-My bladder is the size of an acorn, my nickname is Plank, I'm twitchy, and I'm not "down" with your existence.

-I sleep in a serpentine cocoon of golden raindrops.
-Word.