Jason "Dirty Eggs" Bauman aka Tucker the Toddler Fucker aka Naughty Nikolai aka Brutus Von Beatabitch- vocals/kazoo/cynical asshole...AIM Name - Eatafetus138 Adam ''Bitchin' Tits'' Nurre aka Frankie Flatbread aka Saucy Sprinkler Ass aka Beaver Tooth Boris - drums/vocals/dirty feet...AIM Name - Midget641 Miguel the Dirty Mexican aka Tapioca Tiggy aka Tony Two Shoes aka Miggy B. Stroganoff aka Tic-Tac Tony Titty Flicker - guitar/knife fights/metal noises Andy "Crybaby" Dole aka Rodney Q. Thunderbottom aka The Pubeless Wonder aka Andy Van Damme - bass/hugs/chef pants
Cheese Coneys, Male Models, Crave Cases, Garbage Pail Kids, Jason's boyfriend Joey, Women (only below the belt), Karate, Dripping Nipple Wax, all of our Dojos, Jean Claude Van Damme (Lionheart only, although kickboxer 2 is the tits), TJ Houshamanzadeh, and Danny Devito.
Sounds Like
Imagine walking into an orgy with your mother wearing nothing but boots and bling. Your mom looks at you and asks you for a diet rootbeer, then you spit in her face and tell her that you never liked watching "Hee-Haw". A giant bird then comes out of the sky and bites Micheal Bolton's third nipple off. He belts out a few notes while a train runs over a herd of homosexual llamas a few feet away. It sounds like a mix between that and James Taylor.
Eatafetus was brought into this world to remind the people that there is not more to life than bending elbows the wrong way and having sex with drunken minors. The world is a sad place so make sure you hurt as many people as possible and stick your dick into the nearest willing wet hole. Eat fatty food and indulge yourself in all that is wrong. Love us or hate us, we will still play our shitty anthems as loud as possible. Hear what the skeptics have to say:
I'd rather tickle a limp dicked dead hyena than ever listen to that poppycock again - Larry the Satellite Installer Guy
Whoa! - Keanu Reeves
I wouldn't let Eatafetus drink my cum if they were dying of thirst - Dr. Phil
!!BUY OUR SHIT!!
all prices include postage. click the image to buy online through paypal.
-CDs-
"Shitty Songs for Shitty People" cd $8
"We Are The Lunch Rush" e.p. $5
-Shirts-
A real american hero. S-XL $12, XXL $13
Mr. T ain't scared of shit, except planes. S-XL $12, XXL $13
Hey guys if you could, please email me your shows for June so that I can post them on the page. I love helpin out and promoting, so if you could help me promote you, that'd be awesome!! Thanks!!
Hey guys, June's coming soon (crazy) SO, to help me help you, please email any june shows you have so I can post them on the myspace. Scenecinnati isn't huge yet, but its growing fast. (over 500 views in its first week isn't bad). So help me tell people about you! JT Scencecinnati
Hi Im going to be in your area soon. Im writing a new book about the people I meet on the road. We should throw a small party together. If you want to hang out ,message me at my other site here www. myspace. com/toohotforfizzle We dont read the messages at the circus site. There are too many there and hard to manage
Dirty Jack’s is committed to making sure that you earn the money you deserve. We are capable of paying you more as a local band than any other venue you are currently working in the Greater Cincinnati, but we all need to work together to do it! This event was created to hear what we have to offer you and for you to offer up your suggestions and give us your feedback. We hope to plan more events similar to this on a regular basis.
This night is dedicated to the great musicians of our fair town and we offer you a chance to come in, drink cheap, interact with your local music community and see our club with no cover if you have not had the opportunity.
Dirty Jack’s is located at 5912 Vine St. in Elmwood Place, right in the middle of the 275 loop and 1 mile north of the P&G Ivorydale plant (St. Bernard Soap Company). Street parking is available as well as in the municipal lot located at the northwest corner of the club at Linden and Vine.
Please visit our website at www. dirtyjacksrocks. com for more detailed maps and for more information on the club. Please email us at outrageousproductions@gmail.com if you have any other questions that you would like us to address.
This event is for bands only and not opens to the general public. Those planning to attend can RSVP at outrageousproductions@gmail.com.
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