I totally rule.com
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I own that- I haven't done a thing with it yet- just think it's great that I own it- I am hilarious. Don't take it from me though:
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"Milk has never come out my nose before! The girl has a real gift."
-Delighted audience member
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"After seeing her refreshing perspective, I came to a serious realization about who I am---then I decided to give all my money away. She's really great." - Bill Gates
Influences
"Hope is the greatest act of defiance." ~ Damienne
Members
TV Shows
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.
-- Mother Teresa.
Films
The Television Dir Behn Fannin
Stump the Millionaire - Dir Rod Spence (look for 'the Nub' as himself in the credits!
Not Quite Dead - Dir Stephen Krystek
Damaged Goods - Dir Graham Rich
Albums
Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
Nina Simone, AC/DC,Tom Waits, Joan Jett, The CRAMPS!,Cyndi Lauper,The Sounds, Peaches, Snow Patrol,Dead Kennedys (I side with Jello) The Damned, Morphine, Portishead, Massive Attack, GBH, Crass, Bjork, Annie Lennox, Radiohead, Social Distortion, Devil Doll, Coldplay, Nick Cave, Dresden Dolls, Goldfrapp, AC/DC (yes twice),Motley Crue, Tori Amos, Ramones, Fear, Skunk Anansie, Aretha, Billie Holiday,R.L. Burnside, Catpower, Moby,Face to Face, Bad Religion, and many many more....
About me: Girl with pretty face and fat ass develops humor as a protection mechanism. It goes too far. Girl moves to Los Angeles, girl goes to World Famous Comedy Store!! three weeks later girl visits Oregon for the first time...girls arm gets ripped off...oops! girl went back on stage just 35 days later. What I love about comedy is the responsibility. If you suck, YOU sucked! No one sucked for you (although I'm a fan of that) There is only yourself to depend on...so when you rock the house...also YOU. I don't have trust issues or anything though...
Come see me. I'll bet you my left hand that I'm funny.
Actor, incredible voice-over talent, singer, philanthropist, writer and all around great human being.
Oh. The arm thing? Well, here goes.
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I really love cheetos. That's it. That's the story. I am a funny stand up comic, who moved to Los Angeles with two arms, then once on a really hectic day running from audition to audition, I stopped to get a bag of Cheetos (crunchy) out of a vending machine and they wouldn't fall. I shook the machine, but to no avail, so I reached up in there and... Oh wait, this is Los Angeles...it was a Clif Bar...that I was trying to eat on my way to Pilates, after I left spin class, and I was travelling by doing walking lunges, after I trained in the morning, after my egg white omlet. So yeah, I was reaching up for the Clif bar and my arm got ripped off.
Come on. You don't believe that DO you?
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It was a shark.
Duh.
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Who I'd like to meet: Everyone! People that look at the world in all of it's seriousness and find a way to laugh! Or at least be really sarcastic...
Damienne u've been doin a residency @ The Hotel Cafe all this Summer 7 I just found out ! Holly fuckin shit I would have been 2 a few of those showz by now if I knew that earlyer ! I want to actually kick it with u & get 2 know u this time ! I can't wait take care ! :-D P.S. Please Tell the nub I said sup !
Damienne, How's life been treating you? Hopefully great!!! I'm currently wrapping up some Sturgis Bike Rally freelance stuff (ultra-overly busy . . . but the only way to be!). As soon as I get through that, we'll work up something on the Damienne the cabaret singer illustration. A Billie Holiday concept sounds like fun! Take care & talk to you soon, Dane "CHO"