About me:

I'm a UCLA MFA Student, Animator, Flash Developer, Freelance Assassin

I'm also on Facebook and Friendster


Self-Portrait
[full animation viewable at joshuajmorgan.com or newgrounds.com]

I'm an incurable insomniaddict, an insufferable iconoclast and a no-nonsense Nihilist. Looking back at that last sentence it appears I'm also addicted to alliteration. It also makes me sound like I'm no fun, but I'm actually a big goof-ball. I love to laugh and I love to make others laugh, but I don't consider myself a "comedian" (I prefer the term "Wiseass American"). That said, there are many things that I take very seriously. I'm extremely allergic to religions, political parties, and traditions. I was raised Christian Conservative but thanks to a little thing called an "education" I was able to expunge myself of all the beliefs I'd inherited from my parents and now I consider myself a dead-again Atheist and a recovering Republican (I voted for GW Bush in 2000 and I'm sorry everyone, so very very sorry. There, that at least takes care of Step 8 on my road to recovery...)

..Facts:..
1. Ninjas Joshes are mammals.
2. Ninjas Joshes fight talk ALL the time.
3. The purpose of the Ninjas Josh is to flip out and kill hug people

I speak pretty good German and a little Japanese (though both languages are slowly leaking from my brain since I never use either anymore). Contrary to popular belief, I'm not a ninja, though a friend of a friend of mine at UCLA started the popular ninja site realultimatepower.net. I'd make a lousy ninja if I tried, as I'm conspicuously tall (6'3"), I have horrible balance cuz my feet are unusually small for a guy of my height (size 8 men's), and I'm freakishly underweight (buck and a half) so I'd snap like a twig, although I've found great truth to the Fight Club adage that "skinny guys fight til they're burger." My raging metabolism not only keeps me lean, but it allows me an almost superhuman ability to consume alcohol. When I do get drunk though, I have a tendency to tell everyone within earshot about I how I've been robbed TWICE at gunpoint (no joke... if you want to hear the story, let's go drinking sometime). In fact, being held up at gunpoint in two separate armed robberies triggered my strong phobia of guns, which is ironic because so many of my animations feature firearms. Those life-threatening experiences also gave me a profound appreciation for living and so I have no intentions of actually performing the suicidal act depicted in my animated Self-Portrait. Seriously, my family and friends can all stop worrying... I really am happy :-)

I am just a worthless liar. I am just an imbecile. I will only complicate you. Trust in me and fall as well. I will find a center in you. I will chew it up and leave. I will work to elevate you, just enough to bring you down. Trust me.

That's a really old picture that Kurt MacDonald took of me shaving my head, but I've started alternating between a shaved head and a mohawk. Just for the record, I'm NOT a skinhead... I just have a love/hate relationship with my hair. In fact, I'm so paranoid about people thinking I'm a racist that I don't even separate the coloreds from the whites when I do my laundry. Can't we all just get along?

I really am the worst vegetarian ever, at least compared to all my full-blown vegan friends. I gave up beef, pork, poultry and other animals after reading Fast Food Nation.. by Eric Schlosser, but I still eat seafood and I have a "leftover clause" that allows me to eat my wife's meaty leftovers (I just can't stand to let food go to waste).

If you really want to know how screwed up in the head I can be, check out my DreamBlog at www.joshuajmorgan.com

And now let us read a passage from the Book of Morgan...
..Jenesis 1:1.. - In the beginning there was Josh. Orphaned at birth, because His conception was so immaculate that He had neither a mother nor a father, the infant Josh was sold into slavery and bought by a nomadic tribe of circus performers who would shoot Him out of a cannon in a stunt they called "Baby-go-BOOM". A talent scout saw the act and took Josh to Hollywood where He starred in numerous diaper commercials before His career was ruined by scandal (Josh swears that blasphemous little bitch told Him she was 11 months old, but nay, the jurors were non-believers). Ruined before His first birthday, Joshua then spent the next 20+ years in a drunken stupor until one day He had an absinthe-induced vision. . . a vision of world populated entirely by people named Josh. Behold, His vision is near fruition and the time shall come for the reign of our savior: Joshua J Morgan. ..