MySpace a place for friends

This is the part where we are supposed to list the reasons why we are the best band in the world and why you should buy our records and want to sleep with us. But lying is what boys like us do best, so lets roll. (You have to pretend I’m dictating this to a small circa 18th Century English boy while I sit in my mansion next to a warm fireplace, which gently laps my ankles.) Short Stack are three really good looking boys from Budgewoi. They were hand picked by Jesus, Elvis and Superman to save the world (yes, in heaven Jesus and Elvis are friends). They are: Shaun Diviney (that’s me): I write the songs, sing and play geetah. Andy Clemmensen: plays bass to the theme tunes and back up sings the theme tunes. Bradie Webb: plays drums to the theme tunes and plays keys to the theme tunes. But we are all really good dancers. So we have been together for a bout 3 years. We met in a P.O.W. camp in ‘nam kicking Charlie’s ass. No just kidding, we met on a train on the way to school. On this train, we got into a lot of trouble off the police for many reasons: 1 We used to play murder in the dark in the carriage 2 We had races through the baggage compartments in the roof 3 Once we wrapped an entire carrige in glad wrap and a bogan tried to set us on fire 4 We teased old people 5 We stole all the train cups and we all had a wardrobe full of cups 6 And we used to throw jelly at everyone and stick things to the roof with jelly Anyway, we have been friends for forever and been a band for about 3 years now. We played a lot of shows in Newcastle and thought we were really good… but we actually weren’t. We played about 100 local shows in Newcastle and the Newcastle music scene made us the band we are today. But we wanted to play in Sydney, so we entered this competition called “YOUTHROCK”. In 2005, we didn’t even pass the first round, but in 2006 we made it to the finals. The people there didn’t really like us but we came third in the state which is pretty cool. There were comments such as: “Short stack are the worst band I have ever seen, ever.” And my sexual orientation was brought into question, wow, how original. Haha. This started a long line of critism, such as (taking this from a youtube video): “The lead singer is GAY. Look at his movments and watch his hand...” “This is a disgrace to music. They all look like total wannabes. And have NO talent whatsoever. The lead singer is so ugly, and his voice is my worst nightmare, he sounds like a cat being strangled. And the guy with no top on makes me want to puke. This band altogether spells bullshit.” Well we do like women. And I don’t just like any kind of women, I like VERY attractive women. I have never kissed an ugly girl, not once. And I bet you have. So before we even start, I’m one step ahead. Haha sidetracked - Then we Started Short Stack TV. We saw a lot of really shit reality shows on TV… like the farmer wants a wife. I mean come on, the name is even shit. It should be called “the lonely weird country man wants a bogan whore bag slut who he can have 40 babies with on a shit heap in the bush then raise them to be lower class citizens and interbreed with each other then repeat the terribly vicious cycle.” Then we signed to Sunday morning records. Then we started playing big shows and doing cool things while we were still at school. Like in my HSC I had an English exam on the Friday, played a festival with Good Charlotte on the Saturday and Sunday in another state, then came back on Monday to do another English exam. So anyway, we started Short Stack TV. I think we have about half a million views and we recorded a video clip in my brothers bedroom on a mobile phone and threw it up there and it was the most watched music video for a day. As soon as that happened people kind of started taking notice of us. Then Andy raped a donkey. Then we filmed “Drop Dead Gorgeous” on a roof in Sydney and a back alley in Newtown. This is the conversation: BRADIE: Let’s start a website. ANDY: OK, what will we call it? SHAUN: Short Stack High. ANDY: OK, how do we get people to come to the website? BRADIE: Let’s film a video? ANDY: What song? BRADIE: Let’s do drop dead. SHAUN: =) BRADIE: Where will we film it? ANDY: On a roof. SHAUN: Why? ANDY: Because we can. EVERYONE: =) The our car broke down on the way to shooting the clip. Then we fixed it… kinda… then we filmed it. We didn’t really know what to do with it, it wasn’t going to be a single so we just put it out there. Then MTV saw it. Then we filmed a SHORT STACK TV exclusively for MTV. Then all of a sudden, every music television show in the country started to add to their rotation a video we did for a bit of fun. Then we played our first STACK TO THE FUTURE TOUR. That was a lot of fun. Then we filmed the Shimmy film clip, which will be our first single. And a lot of people came, which was cool. And that is the story of Short Stack. Thanks so much to everybody who has supported us so far on our journey to become a band. Because we wouldn’t be anywhere with out you. Shine on. X shaun, andy and bradie.