Charlie Teat- Vox 'n' Hair/
Josh Teat- Guitar 'n' Hair/
Sid Teat- Bass 'n' Shirts/
Rob Teat- Drum's/
Martin Hazard- Wisdom (and press releases)
Influences
Pere Ubu, Teardrop Explodes, Echo and the Bunnymen, The Fall, Husker Du, The Creatures, Siouxie and the Banshees, Big In Japan, The Pop Group, Lubbleop-op-op, Gang of Four, A Certain Ratio, Franz Ferdinand, Kaiser Chiefs, The Editors, The Teats, Razorlight.
Sounds Like
freethinking new electro hydropop punk funk spunk fresh out the box quality yeah?
From the ashes of the Northampton scene came a band. The band. Born from the flaming wreckage of We've Got A-Levels and The Lutherans, two of the most respected bands of the last decade, The Teats formed when their nucleus, Charlie and Josh Teat (No names... names are meaningless avatars of middle-of-the-road values and consensus compromise...) met and fell in love in a totally platonic but utterly passionate way at a poetry reading where Josh was reading some of his improv "word-rape" accompanied by the sound of electric seagulls and blueberry wave formations... They define their sound, or rather, don't define their sound, as "freethinking new electro hydropop punk funk spunk" fresh out the box quality yeah? and they know why they were put together - to demonstrate the word to the future. By age 17 Charlie's spiralling drug habit had caused the ugly demise of several bands, many of which still haunt him in very real behind the scenes ways and in the lyrics of other bands songs- one of The Hot Squirm's last records is a searing comment on the break up of The Lutherans: "Nothing to say/Nothing to say is the new something to say/and I'm saying it all"... couldn't be said better.
By the time the first rehearsal had happened so much had poured from the two tortured, fertile minds that a gig had to happen FAST- enter Sid and Rob Teat, brothers from the legendary and recently deceased Wet Hard Spastic to complete the sound in ways too perfect to imagine. But one piece of the puzzle remained. Martin Hazard was hanging around outside Northampton's number one sex shop and band hangout Hot Cakes six months ago when the owner and Northampton legend Sexy Pete put on their demo. "When I heard it I knew that everything else in the world was total sh*t compared to The Teats" he said, understated to the last. "This will be the most important record this century, the first great record of the twenty-first century. I Know it will." With Hazard at the helm there is nothing that can go wrong.
-Martin Hazard
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NOISE CHOMPS: Eating On Tour With The Teats...
Is a bit more than just a collection of Charlie Teats's consistently
witty articles of culinary experiences on the road over the
past two years. The hardback book is published by
fishy noice chomp house in the UK on November 2nd and features
illustrations from Craig DeCraig. We'll be bringing you a taster
of some of Charlie's hottest dribblings, and our Craig's
drawings over the next month.
To enter to win one of 10 signed and personalised copies of the
book by monsieur Charlie, simply answer the following question:
The Teats recently ripped off a song about a boy who ate too many cakes.
What was his name? (Clue) E-mail your answer to
graham@franzferdinand.co.uk. One entry per e-mail address please.
Competition closes 16th October.
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Just thought i'd post to say how awesum yr gig was last night at Club Wonky at the Coach&Horses in South Ruislip. Why no publicity before?
Althought most seemed to be there for the Chinese Cliff Richard impersonator (our multi-talented local Chinese restaurant owner) - loved the set! Particularly loved yr cover of 'Monster' by The Automatic (but why the different words?), and the guest vocals on the verses by a possessed Mr Lu. You certainly got the crowd going, never realised you were so big in Ruislip, pity Clive the landlord had that problem with the fuses and your set got cut to just 10 minutes. Just as the crowd were shouting for what must be your next single 'Get 'em off' - very suggestive ;) But why did you guys have to rush off so quickly? Mr Lu had us all singing along to Batchelor Boy, Summer Holiday... you would have loved it.
TEATS!
I've been chatting with Mario and he says EMI can see no reason why you can't start putting up some of the songs you've been recording over the last couple of months. I for one would love to know what you've been getting up to being as you've yet to play me anything.
Currently trying to see if Alex from Brakes is up for doing your first video. Will let you know.
-M
hello teats, maybe you would like to be in our music video we need someone to raise the profile of our straight edge no nonsense shoegazing band. What do you say?
