Everybody's always telling you you have to be something all the time. Like how during these early years it is important to start to be something. It gets on your nerves. It really does.
You know what I'd like to be? I mean if I had my goddam choice? An animator. An animation artist. That's all I'd do all day. I'd just animate stuff and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. I know it's crazy.
So I started doing animation and really got into it. I went to school in San Francisco studying filmmaking -- made Independent Animated Films.
I got all kinds of festival prizes and grants and all.
Thinking about making Experimental Animation and Underground Films makes me as excited as hell. I swear to god I'm a madman.
Then everything disappeared. The entire scene ended. All the goddam distributors, festivals and venues disappeared. I mean, they suddenly just weren't there any more.
Here's an example of what I'm talking about.
Overnight, the key publication "Filmmaker's Newsletter" goes from articles about experimental film and all like, "The Cosmic Cinema of Jordan Belson" to commercially oriented articles like "How to Film a Wedding" (Tip -- make sure to have a shot of them cutting the cake). Really depressing, but it was pretty funny, in a way.
Like, I guess I was supposed to take this as a cue to become some kind of goddam "manager" or something now.
I kept on making goddam films anyway! But I hated the messy paint, scratches on the cels, goddam reflections on the cels, fingerprints on the cels. The cat walks in the goddam paint and gets it all over everything. I'm not kidding. It's depressing. It really is.
Film has so many things that can go wrong - processing, dirt, hair in the gate. It's a goddam nightmare. If there's one thing I hate, it's the movies. Don't even mention them to me.
I really need a goddam computerized digital system for crissake.
Computers were available, but they cost a million dollars and you need a roomful of scientists to operate them. I swear to God.
I went to a demonstration of one of these machines, but they knew I couldn't afford to buy their crummy system, so they kind of ignored me.
There were a couple of guys there that were phony as hell. Both of them had "Calvin Klein" embroidered on their shirts, as if it was their own goddam name, or something. One guy was the kind of a phony that has to give himself room when he talks. He kept saying he would buy two or three of these systems right away. What a goddam phony.
Then, in 1984 the Macintosh was introduced...
Everything started changing then. It really did.
Apple came up with this fantastic program for the Mac -- "Hypercard". Now it was possible to make interactive animation by yourself.
Eventually I made this goddam Japanese Language learning program with Hypercard. I found out later that hundreds of people were simultaneously creating Japanese Language learning programs with Hypercard. Who the hell knew? Not me.
Things gradually got better and better. I know it sounds corny, but they really did.
They started making programs where you could make your own 3D animation just like those million dollar setups with the roomful of scientists.
It was really worth waiting for. I'm not kidding, it really was.
I really get a kick out of making Multimedia pieces. I really do. I can make the entire thing myself -- sound, programming, art, everything so much better than that old film style animation.
Then Multimedia suddenly disappeared overnight. I swear it did. It was just gone. Like when all your data is erased in a goddam drive crash. It made me feel sad as hell.
That was OK because "Virtual Reality" came along as the Next Big Thing. I went to the goddam San Jose Virtual Reality Show, I heard Jaron Lanier give a talk - he had the highest IQ of any boy at Wooton - terrific personality... I even went to a presentation by Mark Pesche and Tony Parisi on VRML - "Just a couple of good Italian boys out to change the world" for crissakes!!
And then Virtual Reality disappeared - gone in a flash like Multimedia and the Independent film Scene...
But then at the same time Virtual Reality went away, the goddam Internet appeared, for crissakes!!
Thus began the part of my life you could call my life on the net.
The Internet is like "Waynes World" where you have a goddam TV broadcast studio in your basement, except it's also 24/7 and International! You'd like it. You really would.
And now the Internet is expanding - and getting faster. Pretty soon you can download High Definition Movies right off the net and store them on your hard drive. No more information in physical form sitting on your shelf.
I get excited as hell thinking about it. I really do.
So I'm going to be making High Definition Movies from now on - no more goddam interactivity - just kick back and watch the goddam movie.
A lot of people, expecially this one psychoanalyst guy they have here, keep asking me what I'm going to do next if the goddam High Definition Movie Thing disappears like film and multimedia and virtual reality. It's such a stupid question, in my opinion. I mean how do you know what you're going to do till you *do* it? The answer is, you don't. I *think* I'd try some other latest Big New Thing, but how the hell do I know?
"Typically, in a cartoon, the story will build up and it all comes together at the end... Well, your stuff generally never gets to the point where it all comes together... not that it's coming apart, it just seems like it should have come together, but the end is usually missing... or comes first or something, right??"
"I liked your old movies better - when are you going to make something new that is as good as the old stuff?"
"None of the characters are established -- in fact they change personalities in different animations. Why is there no consistency here??, while on the other hand, the paintings of Ettore Bugatti, Joe Gould, Tom Waits, Gram Parsons, etc., are all actually John Moses Browning -- Why is this??"
"...and is this stuff actually any good?? I mean, like, I've never even *heard* of Vince Collins, and what if I like some of this stuff and then later I find out it's no good -- how do I deal with this??"
"You seem to like the little details and asides -- in fact, it looks like that's all you like, sometimes. Is that true??"
"Are these pieces examples of malappropisms or are they non-sequiturs??"
